What Not To Wear -- Extended

There's a recurring theme on my guilty pleasure television show What Not To Wear http://tinyurl.com/33e7h (see my previous post for background)

It's people who punish themselves about their bodies. These are folks who have put on a few pounds over the years, or whose shapes have changed after the birth of children, or illness or just the passage of time. Some of these people have plans to diet or start working out. They plan to buy new clothes and upgrade their wardrobes…just as soon as they drop those pounds, tighten those abs and tone up.

WNTW stylists Stacy London and Clinton Kelly point out how self-defeating this attitude can be. Because the underlying message here is that people don’t deserve to look good in their clothes until their bodies are perfect.

A wardrobe should not be used as self-punishment. Everyone deserves to wear clothes that fit and enhance their appearance, whether they are size four or size 24.

Don’t get me wrong. I believe in setting goals as a source for motivation and change. At the same time, unmet goals can be a source of self-flagellation; a handy cat-o-nine tails to reinforce a sense of self-loathing and defeat. Exaggerated focus on a goal can obliterate the view of the victories large and small accomplished along the way, every day.

To quote a dear friend: “when you wait for the perfect time, you may already be in it and
miss it.”